How to Survive the Skeptics, Nay-sayers, and Haters in Your Creative Life

There’s a Russian proverb that goes: you don’t need to put a lid on a bucket of crabs because the crabs pull any crab trying to escape back into the bucket.

It’s one of the more sobering and bothersome truths I’ve known, that people will mock or otherwise disparage someone’s attempt to do something.

Some do it unwittingly, thinking they’re being funny. Many years ago, I told someone that I wanted to write a screenplay. They responded by sending me an article from The Onion mocking people who think they can write a screenplay.

It wasn’t a deadly attack. I’ve survived just fine, and went on writing my stories, but you should know how to defend against these silly, yet hurtful comments.

Defending against the stupid ones will help you defend against more serious attacks.

The best technique is to find like-minded people who pursue similar creative interests. Their support will bolster you spirits, and provide a place of refuge to recover from attacks both small and large.

My best writing has come since finding classes and workshops online. In-person would be better, but I’m doing just fine with these internet-based options. I’ve made friends, for one thing, and I’ve seen how my own insecurities and challenges are not unique. Every writer I’ve met has had similar problems. I don’t revel in that; yet it reminds me that it’s fine to struggle with writing.

I make an effort to attend book launches even for local folks I don’t know. Seeing them do what I hope to do gives me hope.

But that’s not the only way to defend yourself.

When doing creative projects, try to keep it fun. Help yourself recognize the joy in the work you’re doing so that it’s a little easier to ignore the haters.

The best way to keep it fun is to approach creative projects like you’re simply playing.

Play like you did when you were a child. Try something and if it doesn’t quite work, try again. Think of the tools you’re using as toys. Don’t get too upset when the work is imperfect.

It is, in fact, difficult to achieve commercial success. Often, trying many times is what finally leads to sales or recognition. The best way to keep trying is to have fun with what you’re doing.

When a creative project doesn’t work out, remind yourself of what you’ve learned.

Mastering a talent, such as writing, drawing, or music, takes practice, training, and coaching to raise your skill level. Except for a few lucky folks, the vast majority of us will need to develop our creative talents over a fairly long time.

It’s helpful to work towards various milestones to build confidence and gain momentum. Track your progress and gamify the work as much as possible to encourage yourself to level-up.

It’s likely you’ll have to deal with a nay-sayer at some point, and possibly an outright hater.

If you approach your craft with love for the tradition and for yourself, you have a great chance to persist.

Besides, when folks attack something you’re doing for fun, it’s usually because they’re jealous.

Pity them, but also encourage them to it themselves.